Most of us are used to operating day to day at a certain stress level or pain tolerance simply because we’ve learned how to “thrive” feeling like that. In fact, some of us become so used to operating at these highly abnormal stress levels that we feel weird if we’re not stressed out or in pain to a particular degree. This was completely me while I was in college. I remember talking to some of my friends after a semester had ended and we all agreed how weird it felt not to be completely stressed out to the max. It dawned on me at that time how bad feeling that way actually was. I started thinking about how terrible that must be for my body, to continuously be stressed out without reprieve.
Now if you’ve been following my blog, you may remember one of my posts “The Darkness” in which I first mentioned the concept of the “Comfort Zone of Pain” and I briefly touched on what it was. Well I felt that nearly a week into 2013 now would be a good time to go more in depth about it…
Firstly, I’m sure we all have an idea of what a comfort zone is in general and an even better idea of what our own personal comfort zones are.
My Comfort Zone:
- Very rarely having to put myself out there to meet new people.
- Not doing things alone.
- Not attempting to face my fears.
- Not wanting to try new foods.
- Not letting people in.
- Worrying and stressing out over things I can’t control.
- Staying at home alone watching movies ALL OF THE TIME.
- Dating people I have known in my past instead of new people.
Those are just a few of the things that comprise my own personal comfort zone…meaning the things I naturally want to do because it doesn’t cause me to be scared. Well see I made a commitment to myself many months ago to bust through my comfort zone and purposefully do things which made me feel scared or uneasy because, well, how in the hell else would I grow and evolve into a better version of myself…I’m talking Brittni 9.0 here!!!
Ok…got it? Comfort zone covered and check, now let’s add the “Pain” part to it.
Now, I know what you must be thinking…who in the hell wants to feel pain or consciously stay in a painful place? YOU, that’s who! Me, that’s who! 93% of people, that’s who!!!
Often times, many of us don’t even realize that we’re living in a comfort zone of pain. When I think of what I meant when I first coined this phrase in my head I meant “staying in a stagnant place because of fear and being afraid of being genuinely, incredibly happy”.
Again, you’re probably scratching your head wondering who in his/her right mind would be scared to be crazy happy???? Again, YOU, more than likely.
- You know that job that you have that you HATE?
- That person you’re dating who doesn’t make your stomach do backflips?
- The college major that you’ve picked that you hate, but are only pursuing because of your parents?
- Hiding how amazing you really are because you’re scared of how you’ll be received?
- That past situation that you’re holding onto and allowing it to make you feel all depressed and miserable?
- That ex lover that you won’t let go of?
Yeah, I’m sure you get the idea! Well these are all symptoms of being in your own “comfort zone of pain”!!!
Some of us have learned to be sad, unhappy, stressed out, depressed, and upset and become so consumed by these feelings that any positive feelings feel foreign and scary. So much so that when something positive happens that triggers genuine happiness from a good place that we trade in the catalyst of this feeling for the ones that make us feel shitty because that’s the biggest consequence of living and operating in the comfort zone of pain, the idea that you’re unworthy of feeling happy. (Example: Meeting a really good guy/girl who makes your stomach do backflips, but then the douchebag that you keep wasting time with pops in and out of your life as he/she pleases and you run back to him/her and that pain and unhappiness because it’s all you know.)
Yikes! That’s scary! Wanna know what’s even scarier? People like me who operated in my own comfort zone of pain for literally 12 years before I was even able to elevate my thinking high enough to name it.
And let me tell you, ever since I began my spiritual journey which helped me tremendously when it came to breaking free of my comfort zone of pain, I don’t understand how I did it. I don’t understand how I lived and functioned like that. When my health began to go down in the latter half of 2011 and early half of 2012 and no doctor that I went to could find anything wrong with me I knew it had to be stress/lifestyle related. Once I started learning how to successfully let go of people and situations my health did a 180, it was the best feeling ever. I never realized how I took it for granted. I never realized how much harm I was doing myself by CHOOSING to live in my comfort zone of pain.
So, the question is, are you living in a comfort zone of pain?
If so, here’s a tip on getting out of it…LET GO.
Let go of every single person who repeatedly hurts you. Let go of every situation that is causing you strife. Let go of every single thing that you could have, should have done differently in the past. Let go of the idea that you somehow are unworthy of YOUR OWN love and praise and forgiveness. Learn to see all of your problems as gifts that are somehow working on your behalf and more importantly be receptive to the lesson they serve to teach.
Do this and watch the rest of your life fall in line and follow suit. Pay attention to how much lighter you feel. Pay attention to how you’ll find yourself ridiculously happy for no reason at all. Pay attention to all of the wonderful people you’ll begin to attract in your life.
Understand that when you do yourself a favor by letting go of people and situations, you’re freeing up space in your life for God (Universe, Spirit, etc) to flood your life with miracles.
In 2013, I need for all of you out there who are cozy and miserable in your comfort zones of pain to get out of it. GET OUT OF IT. Leave it and never look back. It’s not too late, start right now in this moment. You can do it. I believe in you and I love you.
I really, really love you! And I don’t even know you, but I know that you’re worthy of love. So do it because you know you can and you know that you’re worth it.
Happy 2013 lovers.
With SOOOOO Much Love,